Terrible Tomb of Terror arrives soon - Kickstarter for the issue I am in is about to commence. I look forward to having this thing in my hands. My Bernie Wrightson moment has arrived 40 years l...
03 May, 2011
The dream had me dropped back into my life, but five years into the future (2016, I guess--yikes, that really does sound like the future). Life looked much like today, except for one thing: all of the men-folk had taken to wearing flamboyant, over-sized old-lady sun glasses--glasses not unlike Dame Edna's. They had curlicue styling and rhinestone accents, tho', (possibly as a nod to man-folk needs), each pair also showed signs of having been designed and built with Oakley-style sports technology.
One of the men wearing the glasses (and wearing them unselfconsciously) was my father.
"Dude, what is with those glasses?"
He didn't understand what I was talking about.
The trend had already so suffused the culture of 2016, it was impossible to find anyone not wearing similarly feminine shades. Just like how strange it seems now when you see a movie from 1990 and can't believe how high-waisted everyone's jeans look.
Even the very oldest men had jumped onto the trend. On them the glasses looked even more out-of-place--like they'd mistakenly grabbed their wife's eyewear.
Still more upsetting, the only ones not wearing this style were the women.
I leaned into the Saab to find a pair of my own sunglasses, (noontime solar intensity blazed down on all), and the insecurity of my obviously out-of-date choices made me hesitate: I chose the pair that looked most like the new trend (a kind of old-fashioned, classic tortoise-shell I often wear in real life)...but when I turned to the group (a kind of family reunion), a little wave of paternal embarrassment clouded my father's face.
"Those...are the only glasses you've got?"
Fear the future!